Wednesday, September 3, 2008

Once upon a time, when i was an intern....

"There's a huge difference between what u see and what u get", this is what i've realized recently during my internship at RELIANCE INUSTRIES LIMITED(Bullshit!!).. I still remember the day when I got selected for Intership at RIL along with other lucky fools, oh.. i mean few(35), from my insti. RIL, I thought, India's largest private sector conglomerate, featured as one of the world's Top 200 companies in terms of Profits. Sounds great, I thought... Now i know, it was a big mistake... I, honestly, don't know how it made it to this position.. But, it, certainly, doesnt deserve it... And about, one of the richest man in the world being its promoter, I, very well, know how he made it to this position... Neways, i better not say much here considering that i've still not recieved my last stipend cheque of Rs 5000/-, which is just one of the many things that they promised me and that i never got...
But, I've a knack of getting the best out of the worst situations(this is another thing that i realized during my internship). I had a hell-of-a-time during my internship in Vadodra... I'll tell u about my other realizations at Baroda later. But, first allow me to introduce to u my Baroda Entourage:-
• Mr. Bebe(dont know where he got that name)- IIT Roorkee, B.Tech 4th yr. Mechanical Engineering. The Mr. genius guy.... With a thousand projects and, maybe, an equal number of research papers up his sleeves, the guy is just as gud at management... BUT, his problem is even he doesn't know wats he gonna do with all that in the future.
• Mr. Nice Guy- IIT Roorkee, B.Tech 4th yr. Metallurgical and Materials Engineering. Is a topper of his class. Recently, blasted GRE off… And is till cool enough to make it to this list. BUT, he is a two-faced dog about which very few people know.
• Mr. Bhai- IIT Guwahati, B.Tech 4th yr. Mechanical Engineering. Radiates a nice attitude with his Long-hair and a sutta butt in his mouth. Just luv his so-what-if-i-am-fat attitude... Highly dedicated to his work at the same time. HE is one guy u'll never forget once u meet him... BUT, he has a really serious problem. He is so desperate for a girl that i think he needs sum serious medical help...(if his Ex-Girlfriend is listening, whoever u r, plz talk to this guy once!!!) And, sumtimes, his over-styled attitude makes him a laughing stock. (Well, i can write a whole thesis on this guy but lets not bore u ppl!!!)
• Mr. L**u- IIT Guwahati, B.Tech 4th yr. Mechanical Engineering. The dude of the whole group. His nickname is a misnomer totally. He is quite cunning actually. Knows exactly wat to say in which situation. A complete diplomat... At the same time, gr8 fun to be with... And with all the girls that he claims to be friends with, he, sumtimes, makes me wonder if the sex-ratio of India is suddenly inverted...BUT, he is a real back-stabber. He loves to talk behind ppl's back... And, is actually a real entertainer at that.
• Mr. Madrasi- IIT Chennai, B.Tech 4th yr. Mechanical Engineering. This is the guy who leaves an impression on everybody he meets… Very passionate about whatever he does… Has a view on almost everything and makes ppl agree to him most of the times… He is surely going to make it to some good IIM and, I believe, will make a good manager sum day… BUT, his problem is that he doesn’t know the difference between confidence and over-confidence.
• Mr. pondy- IIT Roorkee, B.Tech 4th yr. Mechanical Engineering. This guy is a real entertainer with his PJs and stuff… He is also extremely friendly… This snooker champ was, really, the life of the group… BUT, sumtimes, he tries too hard for things, which eventually makes the results seem insignificant.
• Mr. Day Scholar- IIT Delhi, B.Tech 4th yr. Mechanical Engineering. He is the Sweetest guy u wud ever come across… Is always nice to everyone around him… Is very hard-working and outstanding at academics… BUT, his problem lies in his name… That’s rite… He is a non-hostelier… And doesn’t have the faintest idea about wat a true IITian’s life is all about. Besides, he is so na├»ve that sumtimes he believes every kind of shit ppl tell him… Ppl- who he thinks are cool but, actually, are not even in the same domain as cool.
• Mr. MILF Hunter- IIT Kharagpur, B.Tech 4th yr. Mechanical Engineering. This guy is one of the coolest guys I’ve ever come across… With a strong obsession of pumping up his muscles, this guy has a strange dream of setting up the first Indian movie production house based on the lines of “Naughty America”… He is always ready to help his friends when they need it…. A true friend, if I might say… BUT, he has not yet realized the potential of his intellectual talent… He can, seriously, go places if he stops wasting time on bullshit and starts thinking seriously about his life.
• Mr. TG- IIT Roorkee, B.Tech 4th yr. Electrical Engineering. Really hardworking, he was the only guy amongst us who literally slogged his ass off for his internship project… Besides, is a complete lady-charmer (I don’t know how he manages to do that)… BUT, he gets so much involved in his work that he misses all the fun sumtimes… It’s always “all work and no play” for him.
• Mr. Kholu- IIT Roorkee, B.Tech 4th yr. Electrical Engineering. The ever-helping nice guy. This guy is always ready to put off his own work in order to help others… He never hesitates to take things into his own hands if required… And, he is the only guy who laughs at all my jokes… Hats off to him!!! BUT, He is a bit short-tempered and authoritative… This way he, unintentionally, makes ppl pissed off at him…
• Ms. Dhoni- IIT Roorkee, B.Tech 4th yr. Metallurgical and Materials Engineering. The Team Captain. She has all the qualities of a good leader… Besides, has a highly matured point of view… The most interesting trait of her character is that she always, unfailingly, points out the best looking girls, in a mob, to the guys of the group… I don’t know how/why she does that, but she is pretty good at it… BUT, in her attempts of retaining ‘the team captain’ title, she goes out of the way, sumtimes, and tries to play everybody’s Big Momma… She needs to know the line between a leader and an authoritarian.
• Ms. Crash Goddess- IIT Roorkee, B.Tech 4th yr. Metallurgical and Materials Engineering. The only girlish character of the group (No offence anyone!!!)… She is as innocent as a child… Always on her best behavior with all the nice and sweet talking stuff… BUT, her problem is that she is too lazy sumtimes and doesn’t care about what’s going on in the world around her… That’s how she got her name… (Now, I better not say any more bad thing about her, otherwise, she might start crying)
So, This was about the people with whom I spent those unforgettable 2 months…
Why unforgettable, you ask!!! B’coz I got to learn a lot during those two months(Not a single bit at the RIL plant) and realized a million other things about myself and the world… Few of them I’ve mentioned before. The rest of them are listed here:-
1. No matter wat ppl say, I m gud at heart… Thnx to all my friends for making me realize this… I really needed it…
2. IIT Roorkee is the coolest IIT.
3. IIT Kharagpur is, probably, a good place to be at… But, its long tradition of being an all male institute has corrupted the minds of the students (immensely!!!)…
4. IIT Chennai has, probably, the best faculty than all the other engineering institutes in the country. And an equally cool lingo… But, IIT Chennai guys really suck, if they consider their insti superior to other IITs just b’coz, they think, theirs is the only English-speaking IIT… (watever that means!!)
5. IIT Delhi, well, I really didn’t get to know much about this one as, u know, our sweet little friend was a non-hostelier…
6. IIT Guwahati….. Well……. Ahem!!! Ahem!!!
7. Promises (well, atleast most of them) are meant to be broken… Thanks to RIL for this one!!!
8. Gujju girls are, probably, the best chics in the whole damned country…
9. Mr. Mohandas Karamchand Gandhi (contrary to my previous belief) was the greatest man to have ever lived on the face of this planet. This, I realized during a small visit to the Sabarmati Ashram…
10. All IIT Roorkee girls are not as pathetic as I thought… Some of them are actually pretty cool.
11. Gujarat is an appropriate place to settle down for a guy like me… The only problem is that it’s a dry state (yes!!! There exists such a thing)…
12. I can’t work in the manufacturing sector…. NO!!!
13. I m not gonna make it to the IIMs…. Atleast, not this time…

So, you see, that’s wat I call a helluva ride… I wish I could re-live those moments… But, I think all good things must come to an end…

Friday, January 18, 2008

The craziest thing I have done lately!!!

Well, I've been thinking of writing something about this for a long time. So, here goes the story(Statutory Warning: Plz dont try this at your college).....
Well, it was a fine night with me and the gang returning after having a superb dinner at SP.... We were sitting around in the central lawns having usual bakar... U know how it is!!!
Anni: "Mahn, i think i over-ate..."
Chhote: "Oh!! So it was you all this time... And I thought its the smell of that dog shit lying behind you..."
Ya, and stuff like that... And suddenly this devil idea crept into our minds... I dont remember where it came from, but somebody said, "Hey! you see the swimming pool over there? Lets go and have a splash..." The first reactions to the idea were- "COOL!!!"- "WHAT!!!" - "HMMM!!!". The idea was insane coz the pool was, obviously, closed. And we weren't supposed to enter it. It was nippi who first pointed out, "Dudes in case u ppl r forgetting, We are in AAI AAI TEE. We ppl get grades for discipline. And its like the only A on most of our grade sheets. You dont wanna screw with that." Actually, It cud have been worse than that... We didnt know wat wud happen if we got caught... But, still I palyed cool, "Nippi, for god's sake, stop being a chick and get a life buddy..."
Actually, the best part of the idea was the risk involved in it... I guess its simply human to find fun in braking the rules... It was not us, it was the adrenaline that forced us to do it... Yes, we decide to go for it... But, before that we needed to make a plan... We planned everything- How to get in?- How to stay queit so as not to alarm the guard(s)?- How to get out in an emergency situation? Everything... And ya chhote made his plan of learning how to swim in one night. Khushu planned to teach Chhote. Nippi planned how to get out of the situation as soon as possible. Anni and Afat planned to have fun. And I.... Well, I just planned to follow everyone else.
So, We all took our towels and reached the swimming pool. On our way to the swimming pool, a dog followed us from the hostel to the swimming pool... I had a sudden feeling that maybe this dog wants to warn us about some danger. It was really frightening. But, it seemed that he was just an old friend of nippi and wanted to say a hi! to him. Well, I cud see the sadness in nippi's eyes when we had to leave the dog out coz he was not able to jump the fence...
The first thing we had to do after getting in was to check for the guard(s) inside... Luckily, for us there was only one guard sitting inside a room. And he also was too busy, in reading some erotic magazine or something of that sort, to notice us. The first step of the plan was cleared. Now, the second and the most important step was to take off our clothes and just get in the pool(though Afat was not able to execute this part properly and gave us all a flash of his a**). Obviously, we were suppposed to do everything quitely. The water was icy cold. But, none of us seemed to care about that. We were having fun. It felt great to break the rules. I fantasized(not in that way!!) about Elisha Cuthbert from "The girl next door", coming upto me and asking me in her supersexy voice "So, What's the craziest thing u've done lately??" and me saying "It is up right now." I still dont know if i said that out loud!!! Well, It was great... All of us were having fun... The feeling was out of this world...(OH!!! C'mon Elisha, I'm trying to write a blog here... Could u plz get out of my head...)
And then after half an hour or so, when we all had our fair share of fun, we decided to leave the place.(And, after all we didnt want to keep nippi away from his long lost friend, the dog, any longer). So, we all got dressed and came back to the hostels. The plan, i guess, was executed nicely...
Well, this was the story. It was fun. Its always fun doing crazy stuff like this. I wish we do it again sometime. Well, the bad part of the story was that the next morning I woke up saying, "Alright
Dude, Who's undies m i wearing!!!"